Wednesday, October 19, 2011

The Bottom 25%

Hey, you know what we thought would be fun? Taking the results of the 1st Round and figure out the would-be rankings of the lower half?

If you're surprised that we would find that fun, then you clearly haven't been reading the blog for the past nine months.

We could have done this the easy way, by just listing each combatant in order based on how much of the minority vote they received and be done with it, but that didn't seem complicated enough. There's also a lack of wild card element to that, which is less exciting.

No instead, we created a series of losers' brackets where one's performance would be based solely on the percentage of votes they received in their only appearance. It's not a perfect system, and it's bound to screw some people over while wrongfully elevating others. It's almost as if the BCS computer took time out of its busy day and did some volunteer work at the HttCttD Offices.

So, let's take a look at the bottom of the barrel. The ones who, using this ranking, would be ranked in the lowest 25%.

64) Baxter Harris — 0.00%
63) Mike Brady — 7.50%
62) Andrew Johnson — 9.52%
61) William H. Taft — 13.16%

These guys are the lowest of each bracket, with Harris — unable to receive a single vote — at the dreaded #64 spot.

60) John Tyler — 11.34%
59) James Buchanan — 13.33%
58) Zachary Taylor — 15.38%
57) Millard Fillmore — 23.53%

Now, we guess in a perfect world, Taft would be up a notch, but that's just the way things turned out. Really though, who cares if #60 and #61?

56) Jimmy Carter — 20.00%
55) Dave Kovic — 26.67%
54) Julia Mansfield — 23.81%
53) John Quincy Adams — 35.29%

52) Benjamin Harrison — 33.33%
51) James A. Garfield — 35.40%
50) Nixon's Head — 38.10%
49) James Marshall — 41.46%

Oh, how the mighty have fallen. Marshall, who literally kicked terrorists off a plane couldn't even get out of the bottom 25%. He was the top seed in his own bracket and lost in his first fight. In these hypothetical fights, Marshall would be up against William McKinley, who got 45.83% of the vote. Starting off with two losses gets you straight to the bottom quarter. Dems the breaks.

We'll take a look at the 25-50% crowd later. In the meantime, mosey on to this week's fight between Harry S Truman and Calvin Coolidge.

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