Sunday, January 23, 2011

Walk Softly and Carry a Big Bracket

Our look at the brackets rolls on with the Roosevelt Bracket! Ol' Teddy has 15 stalwart challengers lined up to face him, so without further ado, let's see what he's up against!

Oh man, so much exciting stuff here. Roosevelt's Bracket has a fictional:non-fictional ratio of 5:11. Though outnumbered, the fictional presidents are a varied and colorful bunch, perhaps none more so than the one, the only, Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho. He may not know how to irrigate crops, but he does know how to deliver a good kick to the balls. Could be a crucial skill.

Looking down the bracket, we'd be remiss to point out the not-at-all-yet-totally-intentional double Harrison/Bush pairings. Yes, if the fates allow, the second round will see a Bush/Bush or Harrison/Harrison showdown, which would be fantastic. While that's not to say that a third Harrison/Bush matchup wouldn't be exciting, though it would be sort of a Yankees/Marlins-in-2003-style letdown.

Another intriguing first-round matchup? Dave Kovic vs. JFK! Kovic's case is an interesting one, as he was only ever given the keys to the presidency because he looked like the current, sadly-comatose President William Harrison (!) Mitchell. His verve and enthusiasm will be well-matched against one of the youngest presidents in American history (JFK). And do you know who was the youngest president of America? Why, Teddy Roosevelt, of course!

The Roosevelt Bracket is scheduled to kick off July 11. Yeah, it would have been neater if it could have started a week earlier, July 4. That's the way the calendar falls.

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